If you want to
know what a man's like,
take a good look at how
he treats his inferiors,
not his equals. (J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire)

A guy and a girl can be just friends, but at one point or another, they will fall for each other...Maybe temporarily, maybe at the wrong time, maybe too late, or maybe forever

A guy walks into a store and buys six jumbo boxes of condoms. The store clerk asks the man, "What are you going to do with all of those?" The guy replies, "I taught my dog to swallow them, and now he shits in little plastic baggies!"

Yesterday I saw a guy spill all his Scrabble letters on the road. I asked him, "What's the word on the street?" Once my dog ate all the Scrabble tiles. For days he kept leaving little messages around the house.

I got in a fight one time with a really big guy, and he said, "I'm going to mop the floor with your face". I said, "You'll be sorry". He said, "Oh, yeah? Why?" I said, "Well, you won't be able to get into the corners very well."